Long live the unhealthy snack van. Last week, it was all about the fruits, the herbs and the protein wet dreams. This week I take a look at the unhealthy side of snack vans. We start with the crisp van that is always buzzing around my flat shouting about its products.
Notice the size of some of those bags. This guy must be a wholesaler or something. Imagine a schoolboy walking home, after a long day of being bored by his useless native English teacher, and buying himself some crisps... 5 kg of crisps! It’s insane! The boy makes Gary Lineker look like he has a potato allergy.
This is the blood sausage van, which is conveniently placed on my way to the gym. Blood sausages to me are just lazy. I mean we could separate the meat and the blood but fuck it. Who cares? These idiots will buy anything when they’re drunk...or on holiday.
I’m not sure this is really unhealthy but seriously, a fish van. This goes against nature for me. Fish should be sold by ports, in markets, on submarines and boats but never on land transport. You wouldn’t sell chickens on a floating rig in the ocean would you? Unless you’ve suddenly be transported to Waterworld, in which case I think I’ll just end it all rather than watch Kevin Costner struggle to act.
Hmmmm the fried snack van serves up sweet little treats for your convenience. I wonder what happens when the van is moving and there is some deep frying going on, sounds dangerous to me. The man did not take my concern for his safety with such grace though.
I’m gonna say goodbye now before leaving you with one final very unhealthy van. Join me next week for another van special.
This is just ridiculous. I mean, honestly, eating wood can’t be healthy, can it?